29 July 2010, 3:53 pm
“I’m so hungry, man,” Kevin groaned. “Nick, go get me some food.” Nick stared at him in disbelief. “Go get it yourself dude,” he said. “JOE!” Kevin yelled to his brother in the other room. “FOOD. NOW.” “No! You’re so lazy!” Joe shouted back. Kevin rolled his eyes. His brothers wouldn’t get him any food and he was the lazy one? Kevin drowsily made his way to the kitchen and looked around the room. Everything was new to him. His chef had always made food for him, but he was on vacation in Hawaii right then. Kevin walked up to a large box with two handles. He had once heard his chef call it a ‘refrigerator’. “Oh mystical refrigerator,” Kevin said, bowing to the metal box, “make me a turkey and cheese sandwich with just a little mayo. Thank you.” He waited a moment but nothing happened. “You’re a jerk,” he muttered to the refrigerator. Suddenly, he had a brilliant idea. He would make a salad. There were plenty of leaves in his yard and it wouldn’t be hard to gather a few. He grabbed a bowl from the cupboard and went to the front door. “I’ll be in the yard,” he told Nick and Joe. They stared at him, demanding an explanation. “I’m making a salad.” Kevin held up the bowl. "Kevin, your an idiot," said Joe, grabbing the bowl and spilling out the few leaves Kevin had collected from the nearby bushes. "WHAT?!" cried Kevin. "You can't take leaves from our yard, you have to get them from the rainforest. Salad is made from a rare leaf called the "lettuce", which only grows at an altitude of 647 feet in the South African country of Chile," said Joe. "Don't you mean South America?" asked Nick. "NO, IT'S SOUTH AFRICA!" yelled an enraged Joe. "JUST GO GET OUR JET AND TAKE US TO CHILE!" "FINE," said Nick, who stormed off to find the private jet. He knew it was somewhere, he just couldn't see past the giant shiny metal bird in the driveway. "IT'S RIGHT THERE YOU IDIOT!" said Joe, walking up beside Nick and pointing to the metal bird, apparently an airplane, with his baggage. "Oh, alright, thanks. You always were the smart one Joe," he said, and climbed inside, followed by Joe. Since they had forgotten to hire a pilot for their jet, Nick decided that he could just fly. After all, he was the only one who had managed to get a driver's license, and only because he charmed the young woman who was testing him into passing him with boyish charm and good looks. If he could drive, surely flying was not too much harder? Nick settled into the pilot's seat, looking over the array of buttons and knobs. Just then, Kevin walked in, dragging a large suitcase and carrying a toaster under his left arm. "Why do you have the My Little Pony heated barn with you Kevin? I thought you wouldn't play My Little Pony with me because it was too uncool compared to your Littlest Petshop?" asked Nick. "I've told you a hundred times, Nick, it's a toaster, used to toast various foods," said Joe as Kevin pulled out the remains of plastic pony that had accidentally been toasted. This isn't all of it, but I didn't want to post too much. What do you think so far?... Read More »
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